Being Present in the Pain

When I was younger, I always wanted to be someone else. Younger me did not understand that her beliefs and thoughts about herself were holding her back from her true potential. Now that I’m older I understand that what we tell our selves, what we believe to be true, is the one thing that truly holds us back.

I missed moments in my life because I always wanted to be somewhere else. I think we all do that at one time or another. We think that the future version of ourselves is going to be so much better than the current version of ourselves. While that might be the case, when we get to that better version we are not content and look to a more future version of ourselves. We’re always searching for something.

When we’re not rushing to the next thing, we’re thinking about why we’re not where we want to be yet with our lives. We discount the present; we think of our present self as a stepping stone to get us to our future self. But if we are constantly looking at the present as a step, we are always stepping and never taking time to be still.

I’m not advocating that we don’t try to improve who we are or that we stop trying to uncover our true, authentic selves, but I think we should stop for a moment and examine who it is we are at this moment.

What if we’re so focused on where we’re not that we don’t realize where we are is where we need to be to get us where we want to go?

What if what is happening to us is preparing us for where we want to be?

Every day we get up and focus on a new task, a new thing to do to get us where we want to be. Think back to your past self, your former life. Did you ever stop to think that the struggle was where you needed to be or were you always looking to the future? They say hindsight is 20/20 and you probably can think of at least one time where the lessons of your past have benefited your current self.

Why do we not do that with the present struggle? If we know, from past experiences, that we learn something from the chaos, why do we curse the present instead of embracing it and thinking about what it is teaching us? Why do we have to wait for hindsight to examine this moment we are in?

This year will soon end and a new decade will begin. Are you taking time to thank the you you are now or are you too busy thinking about new year resolutions? We are all so busy and our lives pass in front of our eyes.

There is beauty and wisdom in stillness. There is beauty in stopping for a moment, touching our hearts, and taking in a deep breath or two. There is beauty in the struggle if we only stop and take a moment to acknowledge it.

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